Sunday, February 27, 2011
There are holes in my abdomen. Five of them. Baby C has been relentless with questions. He is paparrazi-like in his quest for information about my holes. Never tiring, around every corner he is there with more inquiries.
"Why do three babies in a mommy's tummy make stickies that the doctor's have to take out?" Translation = Why did the doctors have to remove abdominal adhesions from my abdomen?
"And why God put three babies in your belly? Why is that not normal? How come you asked for three and not just one?"
"Well, technically...we prayed that God would give us a baby, but we never imagined He would give us all of you at once!"
Tonight, there are holes in my abdomen.
Five of them.
But, three wonderful reasons why my heart is full.
Overflowing with gratitude.
And with his magnifying glass to his eye and super hero cape flying he was satisfied with my answer for the moment anyway.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
The smell is unmistakable.
It has sticking power.
To skin. To memory.
When I breathe it in my mind flashes.
My heart giggles that something like hospital grade anti-microbial soap makes me do this.
Yet, I step back in time.
To Wheelchair rides from my favorite nurse.
To luke-warm trays from the cafeteria.
To daily weigh-in's and questions like "Is it normal to gain 4 pounds a day?"
To 60 degree room temperatures and still feeling hot.
To snickering...while the nurses chased Baby B's heartbeat on the monitor.
To doctor's from France.
To bedrest and waiting.
To counting on grace to wash over us.
And today, as I prepared for yet another surgery.
I washed my hands as the mirror stared back at me.
And I inhaled.
...the sweet, sweet fragrance of walking hand and hand with the Savior.
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
I have set before you today life and prosperity
and death and adversity
in that I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in His ways
and to keep His commandments and His statutes and His judgments
that you may live and multiply
and that the Lord your God may bless you in the land where you are entering to possess it.
I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death
the blessing and the curse.
So, choose life in order that you may live
you and your descendants
by loving the Lord your God
by obeying His voice and by holding fast to Him
for this is your life and the length of your days
that you may live in the land which the Lord swore to your fathers Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, to give them." Deuteronomy 30:15-20
It's your choice.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Yes, it's Valentine's Day.
I can remember many Valentine's Day's that I just hoped someone, ANYONE, would acknowledge me. I rarely had a boyfriend on Valentine's Day. There were times I was tempted to go down the card aisle with a blow torch in hand, but I figured jail time probably wasn't wise for a church gal.
Yes, it's Valentine's Day.
The very words bring both fluttering stomachs and eye rolling depending on who you ask.
Some believe that Valentine's Day is merely a marketing conspiracy to profit off this crazy little thing we call love.
No matter what side of the fence you find yourself on...I just have 1 thing to say okay maybe more than 1 thing.
Please, pretty please...
...share a good laugh with someone you love on Valentine's Day.
Tell your kids you love them.
Don't take the day so seriously. It's just 1 day...there's 364 more each year.
Think about what you do have in life, not what you don't.
Don't get crazy over the fact that Wal-Mart is covered from head to toe in red and pink.
And most importantly don't forget that God loves you even when you feel alone, even if you are alone. God's love never changes.
Romans 8:38-39 NIV
38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Posted by Jessica Kirkland at 1:24 PM
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
I talk to important people on the phone. It's just my day job.
Although I love the freedom of being an entrepreneur, I've discovered that I like talking about business, more than owning my own.
I interview CEO's for a living.
They just seem so...
Sometimes I am enamored with their brilliance. Other times, I am so glad I don't have the load they do.
Yet, no matter how hard I try, I find myself comparing my life to theirs.
I say every day "Today, I'm quitting the comparisons."
But, before I know it my inner-dialogue is going haywire with negative me statements.
"Why couldn't I have thought of that?"
"How in the world are they that smart?"
"I might as well go eat more cookies..."
Envy is dangerous ground.
It makes us discontent with who God made us, jealous of the gifts of others, and it steals our joy.
Envy gives us tunnel vision.
We become "me-centered" instead of "God-centered."
Check out what James 3:16 says about envy:
"For where envy and self-seeking exist; confusion and every evil thing are there."
That's a pretty strong statement. Think about it: when we invite envy into our lives, every evil thing is there.
Envy is not to be taken lightly.
So, what about you? Are you struggling with envy today?
Let's recognize it and pray about defeating it together.
I'm quitting...are you?
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Have you been thinking about yours? Is this the year you get out of your comfort zone?
Go out on a limb?
I usually play it safe. I never just dive in.
I never take a leap that isn't calculated.
But, not this year. I'm far out on the limb. The branch wobbles beneath me. I feel the wind threaten my little branch.
Doubt is here with me too. It taunts me as I inch further toward my goals.
It's a little scary and a lot uncomfortable. Way out here...my dreams, my goals, are laid bare.
But, I'm hopeful. Peter could have never walked on water...
...if he refused the invitation to get out of the boat.
Sometimes, walking in God's purpose for our lives means going out on a limb.
And He promises that we will never go there alone.
"...I will never leave you nor forsake you." Hebrews 13:5
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
My insides twist a little and heat fills my face.
No, I'm not mad. I'm frustrated.
Don't you think the demand to be politically correct is a little out of hand?
Simmer down now and take your hands off your face.
See, you think I am about to not be politically correct.
You might even be afraid that I am going to say something about my belief that doesn't make your belief seem okay.
What makes me crazy about a push to be politically correct is that in theory it seems good, but the method to get people there becomes hostile. Suddenly, taking a stand is demanding that people pick your side.
Isn't demanding one viewpoint and suppressing the voice of another the way political correctness was birthed in the first place? The actual process to push our culture to be good to everyone, to be politically correct, and never hurt anyone's feelings actually throws the viewpoints of ANOTHER group into slavery?
The process BREEDS politically incorrect behavior!
Don't you see how twisted this can get?
"Side with us" or your inhumane, you don't care about others. It's the ultimate trump card.
Political correctness was born out of a need to not hurt people.
On that note, I agree.
I never want to hurt anyone's feelings. I don't like my feelings being hurt either and I am really tortured if someone misunderstands my intentions.
But, political correctness is knocking at the door.
It yells "side with me or you are not a good person."
But, what if my values butt heads against your values?
Political correctness screams, "You can't disagree with me...that would be politically incorrect."
What do you think about the push to be politically correct?