Monday, August 10, 2009

Class Reunion: SENSORED!

It's probably not what you think.  We did have a really great time catching up with old classmates.  We certainly did laugh hysterically at our old yearbook pictures and we did re-hash old times. People change.  And others have not changed a bit.  If you would have asked me 10 years ago who I thought would return in 10 years for the reunion, I would have definitely received an F.  Everyone did appear to have a good time.  I do not think I have been that entertained in awhile.  Especially since most of my entertainment involves toddler-speak, conversations about Poop, and the latest episode of Veggie-Tales.  So, let me just tell you a secret.  There was absolutely one thing that no one knew.  In most high schools, there are clicks.  And at this particular high school reunion, a click not only existed but formed rather rapidly around Mrs. Fitzgerald's island.  I will certainly not be able to reveal the names of this particular click.  But, I will reveal the premise behind the formation.  I had a secret.  Beneath my clothes actually.  Don't be alarmed, didn't you read the title?  Class Reunion: Sensored?  It's certainly not what you think.  

Daniel, aka Travis, or is it Travis aka Daniel?  Anyway...Travis Daniel Reed asked some of the ladies around the island if we flitted off to a department store to purchase that "special outfit" for the reunion.  I averted his gaze as long as I could until he asked me the question directly.  YES!  I was one sucked into the horrific game of people pleasing. I did buy an outfit.  A layered piece.  The perfect mixture of blacks/browns,/ and turquoise and golds.  There were only 2 problems with this particular choice.  A) The tan I never got for the reunion because my outfit revealed them in their pale glory. The tan I had been talking about all summer that still mocks me as we are approaching mid-August.  My pale arms.  Still products of a 70 lb weight gain (and I know it was multiples but STILL)...they mimic medium sized loaves of bread.  And not even a full loaf...a loaf that has fallen off the the grocery store shelf and gotten a little lumpy.    B)  ....the sensor.  Not sensored because we threw a drunken, class of 00 gone wild reunion.  Sensored because I was actually wearing one.  Beneath my shirt.  My perfect shirt was actually not perfect at all.  When I purchased it at Steinmart in Sugarland, and I did purchase it like a responsible citizen, I thought the lady forgot to get it.  So, I said, "Could you make sure you got the sensor off my shirt?"  She said she had.  

Saturday morning.  Day of the reunion.  I put on my outfit prior to going to shop for our reunion groceries and I felt a slight tug on the left side of my shirt.  And, yes, you can only imagine my horror...the SENSOR!  It was still with me.  I didn't have time to take it anywhere to remove it and I never keep receipts so who would believe me anyway?  You could be looking at the first person in reunion history to wear a shirt with its' sensor still attached.  I certainly did atleast put on a different shirt to go buy groceries as I did NOT want to make the Wal-Mart alarms go off.  Thoughtful wasn't it?  

All night, I was tormented by thoughts that my sensor might actually be seen.  So, I decided to share my secret to an inner circle.  I guess that makes me a perpetuator of clicks.  Oh gave us a good laugh.  And my sensor can now go down in reunion history books.  Cheers to a really fun night.   Pics to follow soon!